Granny Turismo

Marge, Mary & Doris


I wonder if any of my readers have come across this act in their wanderings. Granny Turismo claim that they are the world's first and only formation shopping trolley dance team, and they are to be seen in the streets and squares and malls of our cities, at theme parks and at festivals, in fact anywhere where people are gathering for relaxation and diversion at holiday times. They carry their own loud music and sound effects around with them, and they are boisterous and not a little disgraceful.

Those of you who know that I belong to an organisation for older women called Growing Old Disgracefully, will not be surprised, therefore, to learn that we sought them out and invited two of the team to attend our Annual Gathering in Harrogate recently. Mary and Betty rolled up the ramp into the Cairn Hotel between tea and supper time on our first evening, and made themselves at home in the spacious reception areas, and later in the Promenade Suite, where there was room for the trolleys to go through their dance routines, enthusiastically accompanied on the floor by some of our members.

Sadly they could not stay with us for long, and we had dinner to eat and a further evening's entertainment ahead of us. So Mary and Betty took their leave of us. I was especially sad to see them go, because Mary is my son Ric and Betty is his partner Tess, and I am a besotted fan of them both and of the act. You might not think so from the picture below, where I appear to be haranguing my son like the worst sort of scold, but I can assure you I wasn't.

And so the Trolleys were put to rest until another occasion, and the Grannies went home.

To get the full effect of this rumbustious act, watch a video film of the team at work in Birmingham in July, and a BBC News interview with Marge and Mary at Alton Towers . Granny Turismo also have a page on Facebook

Are you a nibbler?

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I have just found the perfect answer to my compulsion to nibble throughout the day.

I accidentally ordered fresh peas instead of frozen with my online groceries order yesterday, and my delight at rediscovering the forgotten art of shelling peas knows no bounds. Fresh, uncooked peas are almost as nice as frozen ones, and I have been slitting, popping and guzzling all day. I am sure I shall have added at least one of five veg portions in this way by the time I go to bed.

I do make a lot of silly mistakes in my ordering these days, as my brain slows down and my concentration goes, and my now ungovernable fingers, (for so long the reliable friends of a trained touch typist), yield to arthritis and double click keys or hit the one next to the target key.

I rarely order spirits, but I do like to have a medicinal brandy in the house, and the time came recently to buy a new bottle. So I ordered - I thought - a half bottle of brandy and three small cans of Canada Dry. Imagine my surprise when I unpacked my order to find THREE half bottles of brandy and THREE litre bottles of Canada Dry!!! I have ordered two instead of one of items in the past, but THREE....... It would take me three lifetimes to get through that lot.

I couldn't face trying to return the goods to the store ... I mean, how embarrassing! So I decided the spares would have to be given to a bottle stall on our local Village Day in July. This would give me a comfortable glow of good feeling to set against the involuntary stupidities of old age. But alas, the heatwave was too much for me, and I could only stay indoors on Village Day, blinds closed, all fans blowing, drinking as much water as I could remember to, and doing absolutely nothing.

So these surplus bottles remain in my back kitchen reproaching me for my carelessness - FREE TO ANYONE WHO CARES TO COLLECT!

My family photos find a new home

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This is my father on his 1923 Model 16H Norton motorbike. As it happens I have not posted this picture before, even though a year or two ago I did a feature on my father's 'wheels' - that is to say his motorbikes and cars. Today some of those pictures have found a place on a website which celebrates the Norton motorcycle. John, the website owner, has managed to improve the quality of this picture, and so I have copied it back again from his website to post here.

This is the sort of exchange which really makes the internet, and blogging in particular, worth while for me. My mother and father are honoured again on a new blogsite, and John in Holland has found some more of his beloved Norton motorbikes to add to his blog.

I think I have at least one reader who will enjoy a visit to John's website, somebody else who loves his 'wheels'. Let me know what you think, Avus.

A funny thing happened .....

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Not long ago I bought myself a new printer, changing my loyalty of many years from Epson to HP. A different way of operating, and some all singing all dancing features I haven't mastered yet. It wasn't long before I had to get to grips with a paper jam, however. I read the instructions carefully, and found that I had to turn the printer round and open up the back, then proceed to remove the trapped sheet gently but firmly. Careful as I was I lost a corner which tore off and remained in the machine.

Now, I peered into that machine from all directions. I picked it up and shook it. I shone my Anglepoise lamp right into its innards. I looked all round the floor of my workroom; the missing corner failed to reveal itself. With considerable trepidation I tried printing again, fully expecting it to jam up again. It didn't - what luck! But the mystery remains: where did that corner of paper hide itself, and will it pop up again to counfound me on some future occasion?

A month or two later I had a second jam, and without bothering to read the instructions this time, I opened the front of the printer, as I do for changing the ink cartridges. And there, nestling harmlessly in the back of the changing bay for the cartridges, was the missing corner.

Ridiculous!

Managing a website

I wrote here a while ago about setting up a new website for my women's network Growing Old Disgracefully. When I set out on that journey, I thought that once the website was live I would be able to withdraw and leave it to the team of colleagues who had expressed an interest in looking after it. That was before we opted for a content management system (CMS).

One of the two design companies we asked for an estimate was offering us a contract which included maintaing and updating the website; the others offered us a website which we could run ourselves, with a manual of instructions for making the sort of day to day changes and updates that we should require. This last was going to be a cheaper option for us on an ongoing basis, so we decided to go for it, not without misgivings. Only about half our members are currently on line, and I have the impression that many of those do not use their computers for much beyond emailing. It is time, we thought, to nudge them forward a little into the age of cyberspace.

What I didn't realise was that managing a website goes on all the time - that is if you are going to keep it lively and up-to-date. And that although the manual we were given was very good, and despite my blogging experience, there is still a lot to do and to be learned about editing text, adding pictures, updating the events calendar and responding to enquiries about membership.

Added to which I have invested so much of myself in this project, and it has been so interesting and satisfying to work on, that I now find myself deeply embedded in the fabric (or the wire frame, or whatever), and unable to tear myself away. But a deal will have to be struck somehow, between growing old disgracefully and Not Dead Yet! I am determined to get back to regular blogging here.

Still here ......

This is a friendly greeting, believe it or not!

User UNfriendly

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I had my new Yellow Pages delivered last week.

• First thing I noticed, it now covers a third area, along with the previous two.
• Second thing I noticed, the book is only two thirds as thick as the previous book.

How did they do it, I asked myself?

• Third thing I noticed, the print is now so small that it hurts my eyes to read, even with my bifocals on.

They may as well stop delivering it to me, for all the use it will be. My fingers may be able to do the walking for me, but who will do the reading?
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